Thursday, September 30, 2010

Employees Only - The Web is Worse 3 - Speed

Hey there, it's today's comic! Albeit it's today's comic extremely late in the day... but still today (in my timezone)! You'll have to forgive my lateness, as I was pruning the hedges and fighting back insect infestations in my back yard. Had you seen the state of the landscaping earlier, you'd agree that something had to be done.

Now on to your regularly scheduled comic...

I'm not against faster Internet speeds, but admittedly we pay the price for faster service. If any of you remember what unholy jpeg accompanies the clicking of a link that says, "Be Warned, You Can Not Unclick!" you may heartily agree with me at this moment that fast, instantaneous images isn't always a good thing. It's not even images anymore either - you can be Rick Rolled within the blink of an eye. While that's hilarious, I'm not eager for anyone to introduce me certain a citrus related party anytime soon.

Overall, I wouldn't give up fast Internet to go back to dial up, but I sadly feel an old timer's wistfulness for the simpler times of dial-up and telnet...but that is all something Xbox and Windows 7 won't be able to bring back.

You kids don't know how easy you have it! Why in my day we finished our chores and homework because the only thing you could do with a computer was play Oregon Trail and maybe Prince of Persia on the town computer.  Why, if I was going to play a game on my phone it involved prank calling my neighbor, and no, we didn't have an "app for that". You ungrateful hooligans!


Is there an app for prank calling? Hmmm....

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Employees Only - ¡Corre!

You may have heard the news about some members of a Colombian Drug Cartel using a parrot to warn them about the cops showing up, and it being pretty worthless.  Given the level of sophistication that the cartels have shown in the past, I find it pretty comical that they'd resort to a parrot, but maybe it's a sign that the war on drugs is actually moving forward. Anyone who's ever had a bird like a parrot could tell you that all it will ever say is the same thing, regardless if the milkman, your Mom, or a squad of narcotics officers are at the door. So, I can only imagine they really didn't want anyone to show up, or they got so used to hearing "Run! Run! You're going to get caught!" that the cartel guys just ignored it.

Either that or it's a sign they didn't read the manual. You have to pay extra for those features!


Thursday, September 16, 2010

Employees Only - Theme Music

I'm sure I'm not the only one that hears musical scores whenever I'm in the restroom. Actually, one of the reasons I was so excited to get the Personal Soundtrack T-Shirt was so I could actually live out what was going on in my head. I think the playtime for Ride of the Valkyries is a wee bit long for the typical duration I spend in the mens room, but I'm sure I can edit to the important parts for my purposes.

Oh, and as for the other musical masterpiece...don't be surprised if you catch yourself thinking it.


Turtle Power!

Thursday, September 09, 2010

Employees Only - The Dental Debate

Boy do I enjoy some zombie humor. And let's face it, nothing is more hilarious, or adorable, than Gummy the Toothless Zombie. Oh man, what zany adventures will he have next?

Given the current political winds, especially in my state, I figure electing a flesh craving undead politician isn't that far off from reality. Really, it's all who you know, and whether you're on the right side of the issues. I picture Gummy as standing strongly on the side of universal dental care, which probably doesn't win him many fans, but no one can deny he is deeply invested in his cause.

In other zombie related news I've been playing the latest Dead Rising offering on Xbox Arcade, and am enjoying it. When zombies have teeth it's much easier to destroy them with aggressive indifference. It's also fun to run them over with a moose head. For 400 points ($5 bucks!) you can't go wrong by downloading the game and having a go at it yourself!


Thursday, September 02, 2010

Employees Only - Brand Name Goods

Ahh, the joys of car buying.

Today's strip was actually inspired by the game Split/Second • Velocity by Disney Interactive Studios. I'm a fan of good racing games, but like many games you don't always get exactly what you are expecting with the cars. They may look like a Chevrolet Camero or the Bugatti Veyron, but in the game it doesn't tell you that's what they are. Instead your told it's a "Ryback Clydesdale" or something else you've never heard of. I can only assume that when they were buying the cars for the game they fell prey to some wily car salesman peddling foreign knock-offs.

Hey, we've all been suckered from time to time. It's just a shame to see Disney be cheap about which cars we get to blow up and ram into bridges in the game.


Special thanks to the Mix as always for the comic suggestion!